Wang Yibo
Why he is acting so weird, he needs to stop doing that as it’s making Zhan weird too.
After dinner he came outside the balcony for a smoke…..
He left Zhan and Fei in the living room so they can have some alone time… and he feels little hurt when Zhan gets really excited to spend some alone time with Fei without him… but he won’t blame him… he has totally broken all the connection of love, trust and even concept of civility between them.
He took the deep puff of the cigarette… god he really need this…. he never know when he becomes addicted to smoking all he remembers after that teenage incident he had…
He turns into a different person and then cigarette become the working mechanism that made him forget that dark part….
He shake his head he won’t go there.
He won’t…. not now… he might one day have to talk to the psychologist but not now he can’t go there.
By psychologist he remembers he has to arrange a one for Zhan too as the doctor has also told him that Zhan needs to talk to someone too… he will find first thing in the morning.
When he was done with his smoking… he came inside and went directly to Fei room…
He then saw the two most beautiful people in his life…
He saw Zhan was softly singing the lullaby to Fei while dragging his hand in Fei’s long hair…. Fei was sleeping deep…
Yibo crosses his arm and smiled looking at both of them.
He cursed himself how he tries to destroy this bond between them and how much pain he had given them. Yifei death was a shocking moment of his life but knowing Zhan was innocent all this time was the father of all shock and it completely changes his life…
He remorseful looked to them and then Zhan suddenly turn and saw him standing…
Zhan becomes tense like he is waiting for him to do something….. it was always a sucker punch in Yibo guts when Zhan reacts to him like that…
But Yibo gave him a smile and said.
“It took me hours to make her fall asleep and you have no idea how much I have to bribe her (he shakes his head with a smile in his face) then this little miss fall asleep but you had a magic wand to make her sleep so fast.”
Zhan looks down at Fei and has so much love and affection in his smile that made Yibo fall in love with Zhan more.
Zhan quietly said. “Maybe all time we have miss makes her bond with me in another way….. but she kept on asking about you too….. she loves you very much.”
Zhan said with an emotional tone.
Yibo nodes in guilt and said.
“I’m sorry you lost so much time without her but no more… she is our daughter…. and she doesn’t love me more only she loves you too when you were in the hospital she asked daily about you….(Yibo kneel down in the bed and said) Zhan don’t ever think that I will use Fei innocent love in my advantage I never do that… especially to you.”
Zhan looks down and replied in a sobbing voice. “But you did take advantage of my love….. my trust my…”
Zhan looks away and wiped his tears.
Yibo felt someone put a bullet in his heart, the painful manner in which Zhan said to him totally broke his heart….. Zhan is so right I did take advantage of his love and then make him pawn in my twisted sadistic plans.
Yibo holds Zhan’s hands and made him stand from the bed…
Zhan flinched but Yibo shakes his head.
“Zhan look at me… I know I’m a bastard to do that with your love… those pure feeling for me that you hold but I was indifferent state of mind… I’m not making excuse for myself but that’s the truth and I’m so sorry what I did but I’m looking forward to every day to give you so many smiles and so much love that you start trusting me. I know you won’t believe me but I love Fei and I love you so much.” he whispered and kissed his forehead.
Zhan was quite and stand still and replied. “I’m tired, I need to sleep.”
Yibo nodes. “Come we will go together.”
When they reached their room… Yibo was keenly looking at him… he just wants him to be comfortable and relax.
He then took out his medicines. “Before sleep you need to eat this… these are some vitamin course that you have to have daily.”
He made him sit down on the bed and bring some water for him and then give the medicine to him.
Yibo then kneels down and take off Zhan shoes… that made Zhan winced in shocked “What are you doing.” Zhan said in disbelief.
Yibo know why Zhan reacted like that because the moment he took off his shoes he remember those days when he used to make Zhan do all these stuff like giving water to him whenever he came back from office and then ordering him to take off his shoes… these were his way to degrade Zhan and now it disgusts him.
But now all he wants to pamper Zhan made him feel comfortable and know he holds the power towards his heart…
Yibo shrugs and normally replied. “Nothing. Just taking off my wife shoes… you need to loosen up a little.”
He winks to him that made Zhan mouth open in shocked but he automatically stable his expressions.
Yibo then gently put Zhan feet on the bed and made him lie down then go to his side and lie down.
Zhan sits automatically. “You are sleeping here?”
Yibo raised an eyebrow in confusion. “Yeah where would I sleep, this is our room.”
Zhan shakes his head “I can’t sleep here and not with you.”
Yibo sighs he can go and sleep somewhere but that will make him worried about Zhan that he leave him alone that he doesn’t want to do that.
Yibo gently replied. “I won’t do anything to you plz, believe me, I won’t even touch you but if it makes you feel good and I will sleep on the floor but I’m not leaving you alone.” he firmly said.
Zhan grabbed the quilt and put that above his chest and softly said “I… I can sleep on the floor like I use to do no problem… it’s your bed and I don’t…”
Yibo put his finger on Zhan lips “shh… I will sleep down its final and it’s your bed. Anything that’s mine it belongs to you too.”
But then he realized he just put his finger on Zhan plump lips and god how much he wanted to kiss that… he can feel his body reacting after a year but then he remembers he made a promise with him so he can’t do that to him.
He abruptly stands so that Zhan can’t see him below his pants because it will make Zhan uncomfortable and scared which is the last thing on his mind.
He took the worn out mattress which was used by Zhan so many times… he arrange them and lie down but he saw how Zhan looks so tense and confused
Yibo smiled “Good night Zhan… just relax and sleep well and if you need anything just tell me.”
He put the quilt on him too and lie down on the mest awkward and uncomfortable mattress of the decade… no wonder how Zhan even slept on this for years… this made him super guilty that he really made him sleep a cursed for him on those days…
He felt the tear the how much Zhan use to feel so tired and uncomfortable in this mattress especially after the day he had been gone to torture and endless work tasks and then at night he had to deal with the bastard like him…
The heavy feeling of the tears in his eyes made him realized that how many tears he had given to this beautiful person who was so soft and so innocent.
He looks above the ceiling… and doubt himself that a person like him never deserve a chance then why he is still begging that from god and Zhan.
×××××××××
(After a week)
Xiao Zhan
It was almost a week and Zhan didn’t even know how he even survives so peacefully… yes he had no trouble here….. everyone was acting so concern and caring towards him except Carmen and thank god he hasn’t seen that women.
Ann who is pregnant again look remorseful but still very reserved with him maybe being pregnant made him thing Zhan presence will be not a good idea on her baby…
Hell he haven’t seen Aimer Haikuan daughter properly… even Haikuan wanted to bring her daughter to him but Ann reluctant response and excuse made Zhan believe that she still doesn’t want her children to meet him…
It hurts him but Zhan was also so ok with that too.
But the thing that made him more concern was Yibo behavior… he is too nice and supporting to him….
It’s almost a week and Yibo sleep daily on the floor and sees how tired he looked in the morning as Zhan can easily relate to how laying on a thin mattress for years can give you terrible body ache but unfortunately Zhan never got any satisfaction…..
Zhan doesn’t know why… maybe Yibo took care of him so well by giving medicine and lunch on time, bringing different stuff for him daily.
Zhan shake his head… you are being stupid its only one week and how can you decide he is change… he is not… have you forget how he reacted when Cheng took Yifei name…
Zhan shivers with that thought and come out from the washroom and decide to wake Fei and took her outside the house today… he really needs to take a fresh air.
But as soon as he came out Yibo also came holding the tray of breakfast for him… and yes he brought breakfast for him daily too.
Yibo smiled at him “Good morning… I’m sorry I was late…. I got the call from the estate agency, they have looked for some houses but I told them that if my wife and daughter like it then I will buy it.”
Yibo put the table in front of confused Zhan and give him the flower… another daily ritual of Yibo to give flower to him in the morning.
Zhan took the flower and smells it and said “Thank you… I don’t understand what house.”
Yibo fill Zhan plate with food and pour some coffee for both of them… “eat first then I will tell you.”
Zhan took the plate and waited for his reply.
Yibo shook his head and smiled “Ok ok! I told you a week ago, well not properly but I have decided to move to a new house… since (He look away) since mom presence is making Fei and you uncomfortable is much better to move and I really wanted to focus on you guys and not any issues that mom can create.”
Zhan cringed when ever Yibo took Carmen name.
He softly replied “I don’t know what to say on this… what about Mr Wang he will be all alone.”
Yibo sighs and nodes “If he wants to come to no problem with me but if he doesn’t then Haikuan is also here and dad don’t like me so I don’t think he will miss me…”
He had a sad expression that made Zhan stupid heart to feel bad for him.
Zhan took a sip of the coffee and then she told him “I wanted to go out today with Fei… I want… I mean I need fresh air.”
Zhan saw how Yibo become tense when he told him about going out thing….. so he still want to control me… Zhan though cynically.
Yibo hesitantly picked his coffee mug and rubbed his lower jaw.
“Hmm I don’t have any problem but I feel more comfortable if I go with you guys… you know what tomorrow we will be looking for houses then maybe we can go out for lunch and have some good time.” he excitedly replied.
Zhan become angry “Or maybe you don’t want to lose your control over me and Fei… or you just don’t trust me.”
Yibo looked intensely at him and said.
“Zhan you are wrong… I’m sorry if you feel like that but no this is not the reason. Zhan (he hold his hands) you just got out of a big trauma and I don’t even know what’s going on in your head… you think so much and speak nothing… I trust you and I know where Fei is a concern you won’t do anything like that serious… but I love you guys so much it makes me worried all day…!”
Zhan stand automatically “And whose fault is that…. of course, there are a million things going in my head and I can’t talk about it cause you made me like that…. you don’t even allow me to speak to someone for years about my issues…. and yes i wont do anything because I had Fei and that’s why I’m living here.” He yelled.
Yibo stands and tries to calm him “Just relax and I know I’m responsible for every single thing that happens with you… that’s why it made me feel like shit that I can’t help you because you don’t talk. You know your doctors strictly told me you need to talk to a good psychologist.. you need help…
Zhan fumed with anger and turned to him.
“I need help? wow Yibo it’s you who need help from the start…. I always knew there something terribly wrong with you and I also knew Yifei death is not the only reason….”
Zhan accuses him and then he stopped when he saw the expression in Yibo face that made Zhan take a step back.. its the same expression, when he becomes a monster…
Zhan, became scared did he cross the line for good.
But Yibo close his eyes and control his breathing… after a minute “Yes you are right I need help and so do you. That’s why I decided to make an appointment with the best psychologist in the city who also deals with marriage consulting issues too…”
Zhan make a fist.
“Who are you to decide that… no (he yelled) no I don’t want to see someone who will never understand the hell I was in…. no one can understand me and what makes you think that I’m here to make this marriage to work? You should be not in this notion that I came back to give you a chance or save this marriage but I’m only here for Fei otherwise I wouldn’t have put a step in here and made you and your family should be in the jail.” he shouted.
Yibo guilty eyes and sad smiled was the look Zhan don’t want to see… as this makes him feel different thing…
Yibo walks to him “You can still call the police and put me behind the bar… i will accept everything but if you had come for Fei then you need to go to doctor… you need to talk…. because Fei doesn’t need parents who have so much baggage and upset state of mind I’m not forcing you but please think about it.”
Yibo picked his coat and car keys.
“I will send the driver and I will look for another car for you till then Xie Wu my office driver will be at your service from now on.” with that he walks away.
Zhan’s eyes were moist but he did not dare to cry. He is right or was he not?
××××
“Hey, did you miss me…😄 The worst day of my life is when I feel like I’m tired.”😴
Hiii....... When are you going to update...... We are waiting plss update soon......